Grateful for Juliet

Yesterday Kira went over to TaeLyne's to play. It was probably nice for her, she usually has Tae over here. They always have fun over here but, I never even asked. You could just assume that I a terrible mom and stop reading now.

That is NOT what happened at all.

As soon as we got into the car we saw that Dave had pulled Juliet out of her car seat and she had tears on her little face. I guess she was hungry. So We sat in the driveway for a while and I fed her. I think Dave did ask Kira if she had fun at this point, but I was busy and tuned out. I hope she did- because she was about to be traumatized.

Scarred for life.

Kira put Juliet in her chair and she was mad. Really mad. Juliet hates eating and then being thrown in the chair. She wants to be hugged or kissed. Not strapped in a chair. But I did not want to sit in front of TaeLyn's house in Grantsville for the rest of the evening. So she had to scream. again- I never asked Kira if she had a nice time at her friends. Half way home Kira thought she saw something in Juliet's mouth. Since she puts EVERYTHING in her mouth we have all become quite good at the hook and swoop. Kira Hooked. Kira Swooped. She found the object. (Rice Krispie) From that moment on, Juliet stopped breathing.
Kira said- "Mom, she is acting weird. Her eyes are bugging. She is not breathing!"

We are going 60 miles per hour.
My heart stopped.
Dave pulled over fast, I flew out of the car.
I don't even remember.
Someone has her unbuckled before I ripped open the door. I grab her.
She is blue- yep, her eyes are bugging.
I turn her over and thump her back. I guess a few times. She goes limp.
I die a little.

Another thump, and she breathes. I hug her and cry. My knees buckle. Dave takes her. He is out of the car too. I don't remember when he arrived by me. He hugs hugs her. She seemed fine. She is starting to pink up. I hug her again and I guess Kira and I stop screaming.

I don't remember screaming.

We drive home in silence. My hands over my mouth. Dave clutching the wheel. Kira whimpering for us to hurry, she is sick. When we get home sweet little Kira runs to the bathroom and throws up. She thinks when she hook and swooped she did not hook enough and sent it back in to her throat.
I don't know. Or care. I think Kira did a great job. We all have to do it from time to time, and she was being a great big sister. But a scared one. "Mom, if Juliet died, I would die too."

Me three.
It was scary.
That is an understatement.

I love Juliet. I am grateful for her. She is our little light. My Father in Heaven knows how we love her. He sent us her little sweetness. We are thankful.

After all of this- I was changing her and putting her in her jammies. I said- Is it time for bed baby?

She waved bye bye. first time. It was adorable.