Mind - not focused.

I am up really early today. Mind is racing- going through all that needs to happen this week. pondering my wonderful weekend. Taking stock of all my blessings. I love my time of solitude.
I was feeling so calm and serene, I thought I would jot down a few random thoughts.

• I love campfire. Just love it. Smores made from PB cups are really really good!
• Bauer looks so cute in a sweater.
• My in-laws are awesome. My father-in-law looks amazing for 90 years old. lol
• My son looks so handsome in his new suit.
• Jack is so funny.
  
• David is the best husband in the entire world.
• I can't believe how responsible Jordan is becoming.
  
• I hate MSG. Poor Nicole had a really pukey weekend.
• Alison might need me to kick her demons butts. I am really good at that!
• My back only barely hurts today! Woo hooo
• Why did my girls inherit my rotten headaches?
• If I can get my bathrooms clean, I will be really happy. It does not take much!
• I want to order some new clothes. But will all my working out...should I wait?
• Women's Conference was so wonderful. I love going in person.
• Aunt Janet and Maile looked gorgeous.
• I have really wonderful friends.
• Wish I knew why we lost our baby. Still.
• I need a fortune cookie to tell me something will happen this year. LOL
• Oh- I should start laundry!
• Kira's eyes are still bruised. How much longer???
• I should go back to bed.
• Dave's shirts need ironed.
• I love my job. So grateful for it.
• Prayers really are answered.
• Less that 3 weeks until vacation!
• Hope Rebbekah is ok. Loves!
• I wonder if LiL is a mommy yet?
• My mom is really sweet. She had tons of fun doing my hair.
• Do blondes really have more fun?
• I need to take Ruth to Bucco de Beppo. Olive Garden is ...ok.
• My arms are itchy!
• I love morning!
  

It has begun.

Torture. That's how it feels sometimes. There is no getting around it- exercise feels like torture when you are out of shape and carrying extra to boot.

I was doing much better during the winter and spring. My Mare would come over and we were boogy woogy. I know Mare had to go work out again after she did with me- because her fitness level is...let's just go with GINORMOUS compared to me. (wow- even that is an understatement!) But I was going and doing.

Then I was pregnant. Exercise went right out the window! I was beyond and description of tired. I did try from time to time, but just found myself in frantic states of nausea before too long.

Then I lost the baby. The last thing on this planet I wanted to do was exercise! That is about the most laughable thing I can think of. I was way too bummed out for that! Sitting, missing the baby, and trying not to be angry sounded much more like me right???

So now its time. Gotta get with it! I decided to try a few small lifestyle changes- and they have been going well- but the dreaded torture of exercise- had still been ignored. So I started walking again. Meh- did not feel like enough. Then my patented walk, jog, collapse. Mostly it was just walk, a minute of jogging, then horrible scenes of collapse. Wow- does that NOT need an audience. I had to do something else. I had let 6 pounds go- but nothing else for like 2 weeks. Bit the big bullet here and sought help beyond my walks. I am in tears about the upcoming torture. I can remember the days of 13 miles of running. (Seems like a joke right? Me? It was me! I swear it!) How that was possible is beyond my ability to process now. Was another person- another lifetime. But its not forgotten, and possible to find myself again at somewhere in between 13 miles and here. I started my new program smallish tonight- with a nice 25 minutes on the elliptical. A perfect fat burning heart rate- an I actually feel pretty decent. I ALMOST think I could have a good time...but I know the torture is coming. The blood. The sweat. The tears. The river I plan on crying. Oh goody?

It not to mean that another little baby is not in our future. How could I go from loving the idea of being a new mommy again- to nothing at all? But it still seems so scary to go through that again. I am not even sure I could. For now, I have opened up my arms to sessions of cruel and unusual torture. The joy of a little one will happen when it is best for me.

Counting down from 8th

Wanna know what is on my mind? 8th graders. Yep. I have these two classes full of them. They are an interesting creature. Never in all my days will I be able to comprehend the eighth grader. They are sweet and silly. Obnoxious and terrifying. Most of them are down right adorable, a few are gorgeous girls whose fathers should by big huge shot guns, and a few need a few more minutes growing out of their awkward phase. There are a few in-particular who especially boggle my mind. One, who my daughter has a crush on. One, who is so irritating, I could hunt him down in the jungle and lead him to a tiger trap. And lastly one, who is so sweet, but he scares me to death.
The one my daughter likes is super cute. He is nice, polite, and is the only one in his group who is never off task. Well..... he does not SEEM to be off task. I can't figure out if he is a nice kid or if he is trying to impress me. (Ok- so its working...but it still does not mean that my daughter can date. She can however invite him to dance with her at the sock-hop.)
The one, who is obnoxious perplexes me because- while he is a huge dork, always in trouble, and never listens to anyone because he is too busy being the class clown. YET- he seems like the most popular kid around. WHY that kid? Seems to me that he would be on the radar as Mr. Avoidable.
Lastly the sweet kid. I hear his conversations with his peers, trying to help them with work, talking to a girl who was sad, and actually cheering her up, and sticking up for the class dork when others made fun of him. But if I talk to him- he turns into a TOTALLY different person, mouthy, belligerent, and I THINK he has ants in his pants! Scary! Is he a Jekyll and Hyde???

Not to mention the GIRLS!!! That is a whole other story- for another day!

Eighth graders are a beast of their own variety- and I am still trying to work them out.


I usually have so much to talk about. Usually waaaaaayyyyyy too much. I usually can talk and talk and talk- but these days I am too busy to even think. Its just crazy! This last weekend barely even felt like a weekend at all. I was at Lori's for 24 hours with her 4 kids. (Her hubby ran his first Marathon, and I watched their kiddos.) Then I came home to do a few chores that had been neglected this last week while I was working. Yesterday we ran to a missionary homecoming on Dave's side of the family, then dinner with our friends in Ogden. Nothing terribly exciting or out of the ordinary- just busy busy busy!
But right now- All I have on my mind is the complication that is called Eighth graders.

Go ahead. Call me a chicken.

That's right- I can totally take it! The only thing I can even be considered to be labeled as is a chicken. Yes. Chicken that is almost dead chicken to be exact. Or in the words of Miracle Max; Mostly Dead. I am in the running around without a head phase. But there you have it. I am a chicken!

I knew once I started working again- things would be busier- but this is just insane! Take yesterday. I woke at 5:45. Switched and started the laundry, I checked my email, emailed my lesson (That I stayed up Saturday night to finish) to myself, went downstairs to make blueberry muffins, cleaned the kitchen. By 6:40 I had to go upstairs to wake up he family. For the next 20 minutes I ran around getting myself ready, and by 7 we were all downstairs eating. I fixed Kira's hair, did a uniform check, switched the laundry again, brushed my teeth and then headed to the living room for family scripture study. We left at 7:45. I worked for 7.5 hours, drove Addy home, then turned around to get groceries. We came in the house with a months worth of groceries at 6p.m. I cleaned the kitchen- again- then sent Dave out to grill the hamburgers while I chopped vegis for dinner. At 7:40 I finally say down to eat. We cleared the table, and I watched a movie for 30 minutes. My kids went to bed at 8:45 (after I checked to make sure homework was done) and then after 20 minutes of surfing the news- I went to bed at 9:12.

I am SO crazy exhausted! Physically I am doing great- normal even. I FINALLY have recovered from being pregnant- but now my mind is drained and just so busy! I wish my nerves would stop a twitching and they could throw me in the roaster for a lovely chicken dinner- but it is all starting over in 20 minutes! I climbed out of bed at 5- because- as tired as I was last night- 9 is tooooo early to go to bed. Can't do that tonight!

So please- call me chicken. I recognized my pump feathery-ness. The random running from here to there, and the look of terror on my nearly departed face.

I am Gabrielle- and I am running around like a chicken without a head.

Can't forget

Its been a crazy week. I am so tired, and my eye is just bugging me. I just want to remember that I am so grateful for my amazing life and all the blessings in it. It is so easy for me to forget with all the running around. I have an amazing husband and children. I love them like crazy. We had crazy busy fun all weekend, and love our family dinners and breakfasts everyday. I love my job- where I can not see my talents and skills wasted making hoagies for someone else. I love my Savior who did everything for me, made it possible to go back home to my Father someday. I love my bed. It helps me be less tired after a long day of wife-ing, mommy-ing, and working.

Back to the Future

My kids are in bed, David is gone, my house is just NOT clean, (yah- working sure does a NUMBER on the house! I mean, I try! But those house during the day...the house just does NOT clean itself!!!) and I am fighting sleep like mad!
I turned on Back to the Future while I folded laundry. (its still going actually.) I sure get a kick out of that movies. Even after all this time. It makes me think an bit- if someone stepped in at key moments of my life, who KNEW what the outcome was, and tweaked things just a bit. I wonder if I would want anything different. I think there is only ONE thing I would change...because I still have not seen the darn lesson I was supposed to learn, but nope- I love my life! I love my amazing family, friends, and ward. I love my small town, my kids school, and my 'Junky old Van.'
BUT let's just say it did happen, and I could be as adorable as Lea Thompson, and have an adorable, shy Crispin Glover be my love interest, maybe things would not so SOOOO bad. (heeheehee)
I might change some of the clothes I bought...knowing that when I buy things I better plan on wearing them- ALOT because I NEVER get anything new...I might have not gone with a certain haircut...but my life is what it is, and you may not approve, or understand, but I feel like I am progressing, serving, and really trying to be a great wife, mother, and child of God. And you know? He is probably pleased with me at this point in my life!
(LOL watching the Libyans in that ridiculous Volkswagen Bus keeping up with the time machine Delorean. Riiiiiggghhhhhttttt!)

well... goodnight. I am done rambling on.

Travel log 8/5/09

We had a fabulously relaxing Friday night. Good thing too, because Saturday was a super crazy day! We knew before hand that we had a BUNCH of things to do- but we woke up anyway- and pressed forward. ( That is probably not advisable. Knowing that you are about to have a crazy day- and actually GET OUT OF BED. Seriously? Who is that stupid? Oh wait- that would be us!)

WE all dressed in our Sunday best and left the house by 8:30. We REALLY wanted to go into Salt Lake to the Farmer's Market to find a guy we saw last year. He did CNC metal cutting. Dave really wants our house numbers done- not that we would be doing right now...but he wanted his card. (Of course he was not there. Why would he be there the day we all get up and ready on a day we could sleep in? Logically it was never going to happen. Now if it was nearing closing time when we finally dragged ourselves into to town- there he would be- FRONT AND CENTER. Yep- such is our luck.) So we wandered a bit- having samples of Green River Watermelon, and delicious ginormous peaches! I did in fact buy a giant cucumber. Mmmmm Cucumber!By 9:45 we were rushing back to the car and on our way to O-town. We had to stop at the Stop and Shop to grab a pair of white socks and some cooking oil- because we had forgotten- then off to our old Stake Center. There Eli was baptized, by my Dave ( Thus the white socks!). It was really nice. Hollee gave a really sweet talk that she had written just for Eli. Eli seemed really excited. What a cute kid. Afterwards Kira and I had to walk back to Michelle's house because Dave had left. Probably thinking we would have a ride- but nope. We walk in the 90 degree heat. It was a roaster! We had a fun time with the family, and yummy food. I made Eli my caramel popcorn. He thanked me 3 times...so I am thinking he liked it! (Sorry no Pictures of Eli...Alex had my camera at the hospital.)Off again. We drove down to see Annabelle. Who is Annabelle? She is my new sweet little niece! Annabelle Lorelei was born September 4, 2009 at 11:34 am. She weighed in at 7lbs 8 oz, and was 19 inches long. She is absolutley adorable! All I have to say- is that I better be the favorite Auntie because she is living here with us! So chances are that will work in my favor. OR it could go terribly wrong! Living with us might make her see the REAL me! Hmmm... I am shooting for Fave Auntie! Here she is in her Billi Bed in the living room. Oh I remember those days!
We then ran to the Salt Lake Temple for Ward Temple night. It was very nice, and the smallest session I have been to in a while. Usually when I go it is PACKED. It was pretty quiet and nice. They even needed a hand after, for some other work, and since David and I left our kids in O-Town we stayed late and did it. Arriving home at almost 11.
What a CRAZY day- but it was a day filled with joy and contentment. I wish I had a better way to describe it. While we did rush from place to place, we were able to participate in some wonderful steps towards many peoples goals. Eli- with his baptism. Seeing the life of a new Spirit of God, Annabelle, and service to those who have gone before us. I almost wish I could have such filling Saturdays every week.
But then- I may collapse and not recover for 2 days if we kept up that pace. Maybe not.

I want to say a word about a special gal! Someone who has been a great friend. Even these last few weeks, new job- she has taken time out of her day, and bring me a nice lunch to school- as a token of her friendship. It is not lost on me- She is a wonderful gal! Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. I am surrounded by amazing people- Actually. Its a blessing (sorry ladies- I would not wish anything on you) to be surrounded by such beautiful people who have been through the same thing I have. They understand enough to know that while the rest of the world is so quick to forget-and move on- we have not forgotten. It does not mean I dwell on our lost baby day in and day out, but he is in my thoughts often. My family does not get it. I would not have made it with out these people. I love them beyond words. Thank you!

Ahoy there! Mate-y!

My kids are loving school! Especially Kira and Jordan. I was worried about about the homework load- but so far so good! Nicole is thrilled to FINALLY have an Art class. She has signed up for one every year for 3 years and they always tell her "Classes are full." She is such a fantastic artist, and her creativeness is just busting from within! She is ELATED to FINALLY have an art class! She have been doing group mural like paintings, and swears her groups is the best by far! I did catch a glimpse of it myself and tend to agree.
the art teacher had told the students to bring in an old t-shirt or a painting smock. I had found an old cooking apron for her. Upon hearing about this said apron, my AWESOME friend Lori told me she would make her one of her special aprons! Its absolutely adorable! Nicole is in LOVE with it- and a few of the girls in her class want one too! Thanks Lori! (and all the teenagers LOVE the Jolly Roger!)